How the Ginger Got Her Sticks

Once upon a time, there was a girl named Alex.

Colored pencil re-enactment, not real life.

Colored pencil re-enactment, not real life.

Alex was very socially awkward and home schooled, so she did not have a lot of friends. Because she had no friends, she spent most of her time alone in her room plotting ways to catch the tooth fairy and collecting unicorn figurines. This made her mother nervous.

Mom, I swear, he's real. Wanna pet him?

Mom, I swear, he’s real. Wanna pet him?

In an attempt to help Alex…adjust, her mother decided she needed a hobby, so she bought her a knitting book. This was a mistake.

Alex became very obsessed with knitting. She spent all day tying up the phone line by browsing the internet via dial-up to find knitting patterns. She spent all night fondling her yarn and dreaming of scarves.  Unfortunately, she was also a really bad knitter. In an attempt to knit herself a purse, she ended up creating something her baby sister decided was a hat.

She also wore gloves as socks one time, but that's another story...

She also wore gloves as socks one time, but that’s another story…

It was really terrible, and all of her other projects were the same. When Alex hit her adolescent years, she began to enter an “experimental knitting” phase. This was also a mistake.

The things knit during these years were utterly terrifying. Inspired by a knitting book entitled “Stitch n’ Bitch,” Alex began to take on a violent feminist knitter persona. Various knit objects from this era include a uterus, a gun, and wearable pieces of “art.” Creativity was never her strong suit.

Don’t say you haven’t been warned.

MY EYES, MY EYES!

After this, Alex put the needles down for a bit in an attempt to make friends who weren’t made of wool. She succeeded, and she even gained a couple social skills.

When she started college as an English major a few years later, she realized she needed a new outlet to deal with school. Since taking up alcoholism like other writers wasn’t an option, knitting decided to make a glorious comeback. This time around, it wasn’t creepy. Alex learned to knit cool sweaters, complicated scarves and adorable toys.

She then met a boy.

Rawr.

Rawr.

This boy loved the things she knit. He inspired her to be creative again (sans the uteri), and she made him awesome knit presents while they watched sports together.

They also got an adorable dog who looked like a sheep. Alex was very pleased, since owning a sheep in the suburbs is illegal.

Yes, that it a knit bow tie.

My sheep, I mean dog, Scruffers.

This all made it easy for Alex to say yes to eventually marrying said boy, and they lived happily ever after.

The End.

Well… Not really. Real life occurred somewhere in there as well.

Alex is a full-time student at Cal Poly Pomona in Literature with a Journalism minor on the side while trying to figure out the rest of her life and plan a wedding. The fiance is a little ahead of her in the life planning thing but still doing the same. Unfortunately, knitting is not Alex’s sole career. She’s also an English tutor and a Disneyland cast member, so knitting time is not always plentiful, but it does keep her sane.

Thus Ginger Sticks was born, so perhaps it is only the beginning after all.

 

 

All photos by Alex Walper.

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